How do you respond when someone asks your age?
- I am ancient.
- Somewhere between zero and 100.
- I’m as old as my tongue, but definitely older than my teeth.
- I’m younger than 100, but older than five.
- I might as well be a fossil.
- Who said I got chronologically dated?
- I’m -123418092891239.
- I’m a day older than I was yesterday.
How do you give a comeback?
- You’re the reason God created the middle finger.
- Your secrets are always safe with me.
- You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.
- I may love to shop but I will never buy your bull.
- I’d give you a nasty look but you’ve already got one.
- Someday you’ll go far.
Who said you are old? “You Are Old, Father William” is a poem by Lewis Carroll that appears in his 1865 book Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. It is recited by Alice in Chapter 5, “Advice from a Caterpillar” (Chapter 3 in the original manuscript).
What to say if someone tells you to shut up?
- 01“Awww, are you having a bad day?”
- 02“I will not be silenced!”
- 03“Make me.”
- 04“Your wish is my command.”
- 05“Roses are red, violets are blue.
- 06“If you don’t wanna hear me, cover your ears.”